What we're trying not to turn into...



(Though James did nearly use the phrase 'ethereal haze' the other day)

We heard a quite mind-blowing example of a Gap Yah monologue the other day over breakfast at Angkor Wat.  At the table next to us, two plump young girls were having breakfast with an unfortunate American guy....

Guy: So I've been thinking of getting a tattoo but haven't seen a place I like yet...

G1, butting in:  Oh, rully?  My sister and me, we used to have nicknames for each other, like she'd call me B3-squared and I'd call her B2-cubed.  So, anyway, she, like, HATED tattoos, I mean, she'd have my head, like, litt-rully on a block if I ever got a tattoo.  LITT-rully.

So, anyway, about a year ago she came home and she, like, totally had a tattoo.  Only it was, like, EXACT-ly the tattoo that I've always wanted?  I mean, same size, same font, everything.  And I was like, 'what?'

So, anyway, when I was in THAI-land, I saw a bamboo tattooing place.  Have you ever seen bamboo tattooing?  No?  You have GOT to go.  Rully.  If you're going to get a tattoo you simply MUST get a bamboo one, they're just, UH-MAY-zing.  So, anyway, I went into this place and I was thinking of getting a tattoo done, so I showed the guy a picture of what I wanted, only the guy, he, like, didn't have the font that I wanted??  I mean, he had, like, similar ones, but not the exact font.  So I was like, look, if you don't have the font, then I am just NOT having it done.

So anyway, the guy took the picture and he like scanned it?  Like into his computer? And copied it.  It took like 20 minutes and it was just GREAT.  So I got it done.  Do you want to see it? [already walking around the table, hitching up her obligatory traveller harem pants]

Guy: Um, ok?

[G1 thrusts her foot onto the guy's chair exposing the ankle tattoo]

G2: So, isn't it, just, like, gorgeous?

Guy: Uhh...